What No One Told Me About Motherhood?
EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
No one thought that I needed time to mentally prepare for that. See, the pre-mom me had watched plenty of moms change their children’s diapers. And yes, there were plenty of times when I had seen it was an ordeal, of massive proportions! You always see the smiling mom on the TV commercial who’s bending over her precious little baby, getting ready to change their diaper while the baby’s cooing ever so sweetly.
Naive, pre-baby me figured it was just that one time that I happened to be watching when the kid didn’t want their diaper changed, (cue the hysterical laughter)… You know, just a one-off. They were just having a fit about having their diaper being changed, just this one time! It wasn’t always like that!
Changing a toddler’s diaper is a fiasco, EVERY. SINGLE. TIME. Six months in, I’m a mom, changing a diaper and yelling, “We do this every single day, MULTIPLE TIMES A DAY! Why is this such a big deal?!” And then I realize I’m yelling at a baby and that gets you absolutely nowhere.
Fast-forward to earlier last year, and my toddler hated diaper changes! I mean HATED!!! They were the bane of his existence! He would scream, and cry, and thrash, and flail his arms, and toss and turn and try to tuck and roll away from me! He would kick me, (yes you read that right!) My toddler would rage kick me, in the chest, in the stomach, in the arms and legs. In the face a few times, and he came this close to not living to see tomorrow.
And I never got it. I never understood what all the fuss was about. My son, still to this day, HATES diaper changes. He will still fight me to the death about getting his diaper changed! You would think that he would want to get a clean, dry diaper on and get rid of that wet one! NOPE! He’s finally started to accept that they’re a necessary evil, and he really only fusses when he has a dirty diaper and I have to really work at wiping his rear end, but he still hates them. He is a total FOMO (fear-of-missing-out) baby and never wants to stop what he is doing for a measly diaper change!
I had a thought when I was working on this blog post. I was thinking about the purpose and message behind this series, what direction I wanted to take this in and where I saw it going. Part of writing about Motherhood, as we all know, is that there is a fine line between writing about parenting and our children, and coming off as though we are just complaining about being a parent, rather than just venting or sharing and looking for some support.
I was looking at my list of topics I wanted to write about in this new series. And of course, there are a million great things I want to write about; the unimaginable, beautiful love I have for my son, the amazing moments we’ve had together, like when he took his first steps, or when he ate his first solid food or started to feed himself. But there were also a million and one hilarious things I wanted to write about; like my son projectile vomiting in the backseat or the first time I changed my son in public. And I feel very conflicted about this series because while I want it to be a funny, a comic relief sort of series, I also don’t want to come off as ungrateful for the wonderful life I have. I don’t want to be judged harshly for the way I feel or what I write about.
So, I haven’t really written very much in this series because of that. I’ve been really evaluating the purpose of this series and what I want the message to be while also not attracting an angry mob. And I realized that I just want it to be something easy, fun. Light and breezy. Nothing to be taken too seriously. There are so many things that we go into
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motherhood without a single clue about. And while some of them are laughable, others are more serious and heartfelt, like having a c-section. I want to be able to write about all of those things, because being a parent isn’t just about loving every single second of it to death! Motherhood is also about going a little crazy and sort of complaining about what no one thought to tell you about this crazy adventure! And while I was really thinking about the purpose of this series, I started to wonder… WHY does no one tell us about some of these things?
Maybe no one tells us about all of these things because, at the point where they would tell us, or warn us, it’s already too late. We are already well on our journey to becoming a parent, and who wants to walk around being the bearer of bad news? Who wants to constantly be talking or hearing about all these aggravating moments, the struggles and hardships of being a parent and raising a tiny human being. No one wants to hear that they are inevitably going to get thrown up on! While a mother is caressing her beautiful baby bump, who wants to be the person who says, “You know
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there’s going to be a million blow-outs, right?”
So, I decided to just throw caution to the wind and write about it all, anyways! And maybe there will be an angry mob. Maybe there will be people who tell me that I’m ungrateful for my little bundle of joy. There’s always someone who’s going to tell you that you should enjoy every single moment, even the bad ones. But you know what, you also need to laugh about those moments. You don’t need to love every single moment. It’s okay, it’s part of being a parent.
I’m not going to let the possibility of offending someone stop me from doing what I really love, and that’s writing. I used to be really excited about creating this series, and I’ve let the fear of everyone else take that from me. So I’m not going to let that happen anymore.
As always, keep on loving those little ones, even if they’re getting on your nerves this week, and don’t forget to live fearlessly! Without you guys, all of my readers and followers, I wouldn’t be here. So thank you for that. Don’t forget to write something amazing this week!!!