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Friday, October 5, 2018

An Open Letter | My Son's Name is Jackson...

An Open Letter | My Son's Name is Jackson... | The Mom Blog WI | A Letter to the people who give my toddler a nickname he hasn't asked for. #Blogging #Toddlers #Parenting #Letters #MomLife

To the people who give my son a nickname he hasn't asked for... 
His name is Jackson.

An Open Letter | My Son's Name is Jackson... | The Mom Blog WI | A Letter to the people who give my toddler a nickname he hasn't asked for. #Blogging #Toddlers #Parenting #Letters #MomLife

Not Jax. Not Jack... Not Jaxxon. It's Jackson. 
I gave him that name because I wanted him to be called Jackson.


    Not because I wanted his name to be shortened to Jax. Not because I wanted people like you to give him a nickname that he hasn't asked for. Not when he can't even tell you if he's okay with being called anything other than his given name. 

    You're making a decision for him. You've decided that it's okay to call my son by a name other than his own, and I don't appreciate it. At the very least, I would ask you if it's alright to call your child Jax. And if you asked me, I would tell you, 'no, it's not okay.' And even as I stand there and call my son by his full name, you continue to call him Jax. I'm trying to tell you that I want you to call him by his name. I'm trying to be polite, but you don't get it. 

    You've never even asked if it's okay to call my son by any name other than his. And it drives me crazy. It makes me mad, because it shouldn't even be my choice; I won't even decide that for him and I'm his mother. What gives you the right to make that decision for him? It should be my son's choice, because it's his name. It's his identity. 



    He should get to decide that he wants to be called Jax. He shouldn't be called Jax because people like you have called him that all his life. He should get to tell his friends that he'd like for them to call him Jack, or Jax, or JJ, or whatever else he may decide he likes to be called. He should get to decide his nickname; not you. He is Jackson... That's his name. 

    Sure, maybe I don't have anything to stand on because I just picked a name for him when he was bornWhat's the big deal with calling him by a shortened version of his name? 

    It is a big deal. It's a big deal to me, because I sat, and I agonized for weeks and months. I thought about it for a long time because I wanted to pick the right name for him. I wanted it to be perfect. I held that little boy in my belly for months and agonized over what he should be called. I made a decision that Jackson was the perfect name for him. It was a good, strong name. It was the name that felt the most right when I saw his beautiful face. 




I thought about calling him Jax, or Jack. 
I thought about spelling it Jaxon and letting him shorten it to Jax. 
I even thought about just naming him Jax.

But guess what? I didn't. 

    It's a matter of respect. I decided to name him Jackson; not just because I liked that name and I chose it on a whim. It was the name that fit him best; he looked just like a Jackson to me. But it's not just about respecting my decision; it's about respecting my son. He should get to decide if he wants to be called something else. Bottom line. End of story. 


If I don't call my son 
by anything other than his name, 
then neither should you. 

    Call me uptight or shrewd. Call me old-fashioned. Call me a high and mighty for feeling this way; I don't care. Tell me to get off my high horse. Go ahead and tell me I'm over-reacting. I'll tell you that you're wrong. Say whatever you would like, because this is my job. 

    It is my job to stand up for my son. It's my job to defend his decisions and I'm choosing to stand for this. I'm defending the possible future decision he gets to make when he's older, when he is capable of deciding. I'm protecting his right to chose what he would like his name to be, if anything other than what it is now. You don't get to thrust nicknames onto him that he hasn't and can't ask for; that's not your place. You should not get to make this decision for him. He should get to make that decision for himself. 



    What about you? How does it make you feel when someone calls your child an unwanted nickname? Does it bother you or make you feel uncomfortable? How would you handle this situation? 

    Thank you so much for reading, I can't tell you how much I appreciate it. You guys are what keeps me going! As always, keep on loving those little ones like only you know how! I hope everyone has a great weekend!


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